monday doesn't deserve proper punctuation

 This is going to be whiny. Which feels kind of shitty because I haven't posted in a while, but rest assured that I have a very sappy post about Eli and wrestling and another about how fun my kids are and another about this cold plunging bug I've got in my butt now. But today? Today can fucking suck it. It actually didn't start SUPER terrible, except that my damn period started a stupid week early and I'm pretty over the "Is it hormones? Is it perimenopause? Is it Cushings?" game. But then!

I have a kid, who shall remain nameless, but who I am working actively to move from a manager to a consultant role. Said kid has a 0 hour class as a result of some previously questionable (they're not questionable and this was not unforeseen. Back in my manager days, I think I very clearly outlined this possibility) life decisions. Whatevs. Except now said kid has determined that he they don't actually have to attend that class and can do the work independently. I remain dubious. Except that said kid blocks C's car in the morning and requires waking so half of the family can leave on time. And now since they're not leaving early, are in the shower during the same time I'm trying to usher another kid, another very ADHD kid, through their morning routine. Which led to me cop-knocking on the bathroom door this morning and arguing about how 7:30-8:00 actually is NOT 10 minutes. 

THEN, I rallied and Averson and I were headed out almost nearly on time. My last chore of the morning (after laundry and litter boxes and dishes and kid herding) is to put the dogs in their crates. This has become a huge PITA because both dogs want the big crate, but the big dog with bad hips is the one that actually needs to be in there. So I have to remove the small smelly one, usher in the big one, and then get the smelly one into his own. Where this morning I discovered that he had SHIT in the crate. So on my way out the door, I'm trying to clean up dog shit and rearrange blankets for these geriatric Hell Beasts who are quite honestly, not bringing a lot to the table these days. 

Guys? This was 8:30 this morning. 

And then work is just exceptionally work like. And I'm just over it. I'm over getting yelled at by people. Over spending my morning locating, and then cleaning, body fluids. I was so over it I couldn't even sing along to Jolene with Averson. Over over over. It's the most stupid monday. So stupid I'm not even going to capitalize it.