Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Read this to restore your faith in humanity

We visited the grandparents on the coast for Memorial Day weekend and it was awesome. We went to the beach, ate good food, and I got to laugh with my brother a lot. Total awesome-sauce. But the highlight was Sunday night.

My dad had bought tickets for himself and my stepmom for a Bonnie Raitt concert and invited me and the kids to join him. I declined, after picturing my kids running amok amongst people who had paid real money to listen to a legit performer. As an afterthought, he mentioned that a client of his ran a local pro wrestling group and they were putting on a show the same night.

For context, Eli is OBSESSED with pro wrestling. Like, won't talk about anything else. At all. Ever. I know more about John Cena, Daniel Bryan, and The Undertaker than any middle age suburban mom should.

So we headed to this jenky pro wrestling event in a dive bar. Seriously. I wasn't even sure kids were allowed. Luckily there were a ton of kids there and it was totally family friendly. Right off the bat a man comes up to Eli and says that he has an extra ticket. Eli couldn't believe his luck and gloated while the rest of us waited in line. Then we went in and, surprise, it wasn't crowded. We took up a whole second row. We were so close that a couple wrestlers almost landed on us.

I was worried that Eli would be disappointed or that the acting would be depressingly bad, but it was actually really good! Eli was in heaven. The look on his face was perfect. The wrestlers were great and the venue was so small that they were talking/heckling directly to him. I let him use all his "grown up words."

At intermission they held a few raffles. I had bought Eli a ticket since I got him in for free. The MC was building up the drawing and spotted Eli's look of awe, then declared, "You! I hope you win!" AND THEN HE DID. They crowned him King of the Ring, he was the honorary announcer, and he won a token good for "Any seat, any show." You guys, he couldn't have beamed more if he tried. In the midst of it, Sydney started chanting his name and the crowd joined in.

The more I think about it, the warmer it makes my heart. Seriously, this kid needed a little boost and this was the shit. I may be the first person to tear up at a B-class pro-wrestling show featuring a former WWE superstar/porn director.

OMG. I have the worst cheering voice ever. Add that to the weird things to be self-conscious about. Try not to judge. I don't always sound like that

Saturday, May 16, 2015

C says this is why I can't go out in public

I went to my first Daisy Scout event with Syd today. C's been doing the meetings since they fall on a teaching night, so it was my first time meeting the moms. I awesomely spent the entire (one mile long) parade snarling at Syd that she had two strong legs and was five years old, so no, she did not need to hitch a ride on a wagon or a stroller. I also helpfully pointed out all the security problems and ways the girls could be abducted. To be fair, there were many. Pretty sure they all loved me :/

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Too long to be a Facebook status

My work day was SO long today. It was one of those days when you're blown away when you look at the clock and only ten minutes have passed. 
After work I went to Old Navy in a last ditch effort to find girls polos for Syd's Daisy uniform. 
Success! And on sale! 

I got a "standard customer service follow-up" just days after I yelped the shit out of the dealership where we bought the new car. That poor woman. Needless to say, I am not "100 percent satisfied" and the mansger will be calling me shortly.

I got home to find my poor, sad booger with a raging fever. So what I planned to be a productive evening is this instead. 
This weekend is our anniversary/Syd's birthday. C and I have a sitter for tomorrow night so I can wear heels and we can eat food by candlelight and drink out of fancy glasses. Then on Syd's birthday we've got an awesome girls' day planned.  
And a thunderstorm just rolled in.

Sunday, May 3, 2015

I'm still here! And apparently very old

Holy cow! I don't remember the last time I went almost a month without posting. I think even I got tired of the complaining about work. Not much has changed, but I've been able to do some cool stuff at the school I teach at. I was asked to help proctor advancements, which is basically the last step before the students can provide therapy. I've known this cohort since they started and it was so fun to see them reach this milestone. They were so nervous, and then so relieved when they passed! I'm teaching an extra class next term and even though it's busy, I'm looking forward to a change in scenery.

We also took a ten day road trip to Colorado to meet my teeny tiny new niece and to see my sister-in-law get married. It was awesome, although both the drive down and the drive back were a lot longer than we anticipated. The drive down we're still not sure why, but on the drive back we blew a tire. After changing a tire in the middle of the night on the side of the freeway (no pictures because I was scream-into-the-darkness mad), we crawled to a no-tell motel in BFE nowhere and waited for the tire shop to open. Then we found out that the crazy people who owned our car before us put the wrong size tire on. So my souvenir from the trip was a new set of radials.

Happier times
This dog. He's like a needy toddler. He's at his happiest when we're all confined in a small space together.

These guys. They can't ride to the grocery store in peace, but 17 hours in the backseat together is all grins and giggles.

Baby Ayla! She came just in time! She's three days old here and absolutely, unbelievably perfect :)
It's okay. You can totally hate her for looking so cute, and clean, three days after nearly having a baby in a parking lot

Who is that kid holding that tiny baby? When did that happen?
I loaded this picture several times into, until it stopped saying I was in my 50s. Creepy side-note. It NEVER read Sydney. How weird is that?
My mom and I took the kids to my undergrad college. I can't believe I haven't done that before. It was really fun to show them all my favorite places and to see how it's changed (in, OMG, 17 years. Grad school is f-ing long.) Their favorite was the library, where Syd loved these art chairs and Eli promptly plowed through a completely inappropriate graphic novel.


A multitude of wedding pictures
 In true neurotic fashion, I spent WAY too much time and energy planning and coordinating our wedding finery. As evidenced by this craptastic family photo shoot. Love that the best one prominently features the restroom sign...

Gotta love adult cousins who think it's HILARIOUS to "sneak" the baby chocolate. At one point she had about twenty unwrapped kisses in front of her.
And after
My handsome usher before
Adorable nephew Josiah! He had a pocket square :)
This one was born right after our wedding. OMG. So old.

Syd was DEVASTATED that she didn't catch the bouquet and then pounced when she realized the girl had left it behind. It now lives in a mason jar next to her bed.