Friday, November 4, 2022

Square peg in a square hole

Guys? I love my new job. Like, I love it an awful, awful lot. I keep waiting to have a day where I feel like maybe I made a mistake, or maybe I didn't think it through all the way. But I'm a month in and I've had some very long days, and I am still giddy every night when I get home. We made some sacrifices to make this change and it's a HUGE change from what I'm used to. But OMG. It's so great. 

I love my office! 

 I even love this cozy little curb that I sat on to take a fairly boring HR course

During one of my fourteen interviews, I asked what they would put on their Mary Poppins list for someone for this position. I wanted to get a feel for their goals for the person taking over, and also for how they thought about building a team. It didn't do anything to help my Pollyanna with a sailor's mouth brand, but I do think it's a good question. 

I don't think I realized how unexpectedly wonderful it would feel to find a job that was offered to me for precisely the qualities that made me a little bit odd at other jobs. In the prison, my "aggressive optimism" and tendency to look for the best in people was often perceived as na├»ve, even a decade in. During my first week my new boss told me it was the primary reason they wanted me to join the team. I love to supervise and problem solve, and being creative makes those things fun. Now that I'm working in a private, for profit company, I can be as creative and innovative as I want. It's a good thing! 

And the clients. It's all the things I love. They're spicy teenagers and young adults. The clinical pictures are fascinating and they've got these great, spicy personalities. And it's EXPECTED that I will adore them for all of that. Last week we had a new kid admit who tried to run (really walk quickly) away. I walked with her, and then sat on the side of the road while she cried. Then we hiked back. That's my job. I get to love and care about my staff and these kids and their families. That's my JOB! I get paid for it! 

The other thing that I was missing was variety. If I had to keep sitting in my chair for eight hours, I was going to do something terrible. This job is perfectly chaotic, just like prison, but without riots. We've had trapped wildlife, runaways, power outages, fights, lockdowns because strangers showed up unannounced. I've always said that I loved a job where you leave saying "What the fuck happened today?" and this is that and so much more. 

AND, to top it all off. I get lunch every day. And the fridge is stocked with snacks and sparkling waters and even a little secret stash of diet soda. It's magical and I'm so, so happy. I'm sure that at some point I'll get annoyed or disillusioned or tired, but I don't want to forget how awesome this first month felt. 


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