You ever have one of those days? You load up all the kids in the car, sniff, and realize that you didn't take out the rag your husband used to clean up after the carsick baby so now your new car has the awesome aroma of stale vomit? You trudge on, but as you walk your snowflakes into their daycare, you realize that both are wearing clothes that are quite obviously outgrown and worn through. No matter! You make the most of every day! So you drive, 45 minutes, to work and attend 8 hours of the most awful training you are required to do every year. Driving home, decide with your husband that you're going to live it up. Take a day off from the diet and go eat pizza? Splurge and then realize that after your diet, your body no longer enjoys pizza. Wish you'd had more salad, then feel both old and a little pathetic for having that thought. Decide to hit what everyone's saying is a great sale to maybe buy your kids some clothes. That no one else has ever worn. That fit. That they may even get to choose? Arrive at said store to find the sale racks picked clean of everything except SpongeBob paraphernalia and shirts that advertise "Daddy's Little Goldigger!" Continue to look, like the good stuff may magically appear, while your toddler screams and pinches and hits until you put her down, where she runs maniacally away. Take your 5 year old to the bathroom 3 times in 45 minutes, with no explanation as to why but you're not brave enough to deny him and besides, he's grabbing his junk like a Chester in the making so you better give the impression that this is unusual. Resign yourself to having complete ragamuffin children with shorts too short, grabbing themselves and assaulting their mother. Become "That mom?" In public, of course.
Yeah, me neither. I'm far too organized, awesome, and centered for a day like that.